My family knows me so well, it was my 29th birthday and they gave me just what I was hoping for--a hike up Mt. Timpanogos and some BYU football *insert screeching record sound here*. What? Okay so it was really a birthday weekend for my dad who shares a Sept. birthday. I thought it would be fun to go hang out-I do enjoy a good BYU game actually and hiking couldn't be bad.
Here's the deal-Satan lives at the top of Mt. Timpanogos. Yup he sits up there in that little white shed at the top and laughs at everyone who hikes to the top and wonders why they just wasted 4 hours of their life and still have to go back down. I'd like to say at the end of it that it was worth it...that would be a lie and I told Satan I don't lie. The truth with hiking is it's great for a few hours. A couple hours in and a couple hours out. I love being in the Mountains, looking at waterfalls, maybe even spot some wildlife frolicking in green pastures. Admittedly I haven't done anything with my marshmallow over bone body for six months so probably dragging it from sea level to 12,000 ft. in a day wasn't a good idea. The problem was I kept seeing small children and old women hiking, which I have realized were evil visions put into my mind to discourage me. I'm calling out all liars right now; don't ever say you hiked Timp if you just made it to that stupid lake. That's just the beginning, you still have to hike another hour and a half up straight rock to get to the top. At least with good conversation things go by faster. We thoroughly discussed Peyton Manning's quarterbacking strategy (side note I just googled his name to make sure I spelled in correctly...I hadn't) and other sports trivia--so pretty much I was silent for the majority of the hike.
So I made it--good job right? Way to go brother Ryan. See it wasn't so bad? Oh that's right we forgot that it's going to rain and hell/hail (both can be used synonymously at this point) on you. Two hours down and the rain came, then the hail came, which was good because they masked my tears. My tears that told me I shouldn't have gone the first 15 minutes of the hike when I realized after a power bar and gatorade that I was already fatigued and dehydrated. Okay I didn't cry, but that's because I was too angry. Then (and I'm not kidding) lighting struck directly in front of us, which caused my Dad and I to hide under rocks for about 5 minutes since we were standing in the middle of the rock field and might has well been made of metal.
We finally made it down in a record slow time of 8 hours, did I mention that it was just my Dad and me? Oh yeah, my brothers decided to slide down the glacier instead. Both my knees were shot and I seriously contemplated jumping of a few steep cliffs if not for a wife and baby. We made it back to the car and headed home. Altitude sickness started kicking in and I felt like I got hit by a truck. When we made it back to the cabin I was greeted by Greg and his new "lady friend" and I looked like a frayed kitten (I made that up, I don't know what one looks like). Since it was my birthday they asked me where I wanted to go for my birthday dinner. I wanted to go to a shallow grave and rest peacefully, but everyone was starved so I offered to go to Cafe Rio since it was close (side note I don't like Cafe Rio). That was my birthday--next day BYU got demolished and might as well of had small girls playing defense. I love my brothers and Dad and wouldn't have them any other way--just don't feel obligated to invite me on these things. The next day they went to a death defying bike jump and I got a massage and hung out with one of my best friends.
The next weekend I decided to have a birthday redo. My Dad had some of his hotel points he couldn't use so he gave them to me (I deserve them). We went to an amazing hotel in Santa Monica that looked out over the Ocean and had a hot tub on the deck (they upgraded us since my Dad and I share the name David--what they don't know won't hurt them). We had a great dinner with friends. The next day we took a walk down Venice Beach-we had to stop a couple times because my knees are still jacked up, had some breakfast, stopped by the LA temple then went to Beverly Hills and walked around Rodeo Drive. It was a great birthday redo.
This is for people who want to know me, or think they know me and really don't. I love to do a little of everything. Want to hike? I'll do it. Want to rock climb? I'll do it. Want to go to a sporting event, dinner, zoo, city, travel, anything? I'll do it. I just don't want to do it for eight hours--it stops being fun. You stop thinking about the scenery and just focus on the pain and how badly you want to injure someone or harmless animals. That's all--enjoy the pictures of both weekends.
8 months ago